As an Indian, we know what it means to live with a set of relatives that are so wide and vivid that after a point our brain says, F**K Ya! Why so many relatives? There are ones who are always ready to give advice, be it related to academics or related to your shaadi. Then, there are ones who gossip about their “nanad ki saas ki nanad” and attending a family function becomes a horror story as it is a mela of your relatives who define Vichitra.
Here are 8 types of relatives you wish you could avoid!
The Matrimonial Chachi
We all have those aunties and chachis who wait for you to turn 18 and start to look for a suitable groom for you. You meet them and they greet you with their ever so classic statement "Beta, when are you getting married?" And no, this does not end here, they will surely tell your parents at least one or two rishtas for you, like; "Arey choti ke liye ladka nahi dekh rahe aap? Meri Nanad Ke dewar ka beta Australia me settled hai, baat karun kya unse?"
The Result Suckers
We all have those relatives who will always call you on that un-auspicious day of result declaration! You will never hear from them, and Baaam! ….the results are out and your phone is flooded with the calls from such relatives asking "Beta Kitne marks aae?" "Mere bete ke toh 97 per cent marks hain!"
The Memory Testing Relatives
There is a group of relatives where in you are standing with your favorite cousins and then comes the aunties and uncles who will say "Beta pehchana mai kaun hoon?" "Itna sa tha tu jab gaud me khelta tha/thi" That moment is embarrassing and with the objective to know, who that person was, the eye balling amongst the cousins for an answer is epic. You wish to scream out loud "How would I know you, since you only appear at such events and test my memory" but you cannot because we apparently have to “Respect our elders”!
The Gossipmonger Aunties
These are the aunties and uncles who are like newspapers? Well, Yes! They are! They know your problem(s) and then they just blab it out to the entire kinship. Oh no! Not just relatives but to the world. "Tumko pata hai, Verma ji ki beti ne bhaag kar shaadi kar li." "Haaye Tauba Kya Zamana Aagaya Hai!"
The IITs and IIMs
Then there are the nerd relatives from IITs, IIMs or as a matter of fact are settled abroad. They are super smart, have merits and medals to brag about and voila! You feel super dumb then.
The Religious Clad
Beware! She will find you and make you sit with her in all of the holy practices and ceremonies yeah, I meant “pooja”. She will preach you all the lessons on Ramayan, Geeta and the Bible and god forbid, if you are seen leaving the house without a “tikka”, you are in for a whole lot of preaching on the evils of this world that are waiting to make your life more “F**K**d UP! Then it already is.
The “Let's-Do-The-Drama” Aunty
She, my dear! will add drama to every single thing you do. "Oh, apply besan mask beta. Your skin will glow!" "Waise to sab acha tha, but Khane me namaak bohot zyada tha" "How dare she not do namastey to me? Ye sanskar hain?" But we like them, as they add the drama to our monotonous life.
The Job Description Seekers
They just want to know about your job dynamics. Where all, have you applied? How much is being paid? What is your job designation? How do you travel? Who are your colleagues? And the list goes on.
If you have any such relative, tag them in the comments section below!
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