I DON'T TRUST TWINKLE KHANNA. HERE'S WHY YOU SHOULDN'T EITHER

 

Last week, Twinkle Khanna was at the centre of a raging debate on Twitter. A debate which she started and continued to fan.

Amidst her husband and actor Akshay Kumar’s insensitive remarks on comedian Mallika Dua during an episode on a reality TV show, and a Dua attack that followed (Mallika and her father Vinod Dua expressed their serious concerns over Akshay’s comments), Twinkle was quick not to just defend her husband but also take the “joke to another level.”

She tweeted two “lame jokes”, as she called them. And of course, social media went ballistic and called her out for being unreasonable. Many said for an intelligent and well-read woman like her, defending her husband on sexist remarks was a downer. Now, I don’t want to state my opinion here, but her response is for everyone to read.

Anyway, moving on, she also apologised for her response. Then walks in Mallika Dua with the mother of all replies, open to personal interpretations. “That’s the thing about parents. They are protective of their children whether they are five or whether they are 28,” she wrote on Twitter.

Twinkle is yet to respond. But the entire saga made me wonder how little Twinkle Khanna has actually achieved in life, despite tall claims by her on being the feminist that India needs but does not deserve.

She’s an interior designer, an author, a columnist. She has a handful of films to her credit, but then well they are there. But she’s everyone’s darling on social media. She’s the cake on Twitter and a pastry on Facebook, Instagram. You see what I did there with the comparison? Good luck with interpreting.

She has been the uber cool, photo sharing woman on social media, who is also, assumedly, one of the reasons why people open their phones (I’m not kidding when I say she has ardent fans). With due respect to other social media platforms, I’d like to primarily focus on Twinkle’s stint on Twitter. With just 140 characters at your disposal, I think I should give her some credit if she has ardent, loyal followers there.

She had come a full circle. From the Bollywood misfit that she claimed she was, she had transformed into India’s very own Mrs. Funnybones, without breaking one in the journey. Her journey that included a tongue-in-cheek appearance on Koffee With Karan where she asked her host to go to jail for 377 days, and her wonderful secrets into her relationship with Akshay Kumar. It also included two books, a stellar (and obviously cheeky, funny) release that sky rocketed her to a bestselling author. And all this, she achieved without using the famous, acclaimed name she’s married to. And that’s where she had my heart.

But now, that’s exactly where my problem with her lies. As it turns out (from the recent turn of events that I can see), she’s quite funny, cheeky and above all “for feminism and women empowerment” as long as it does not mention the famous name as I mentioned earlier, Akshay Kumar.

As soon as his name was mentioned, anywhere, Twinkle would unleash what most women do—become the wife to the end of the Earth. And let’s not forget that’s something that Mrs. Funnybones detests. Remember her views on karva chauth? Well, but you know, if she portrays peak husband supporting behaviour, it’s just too cool for a ‘lame joke’.

Actually, this is not the first time she has shown us this side of hers. When Akshay Kumar-starrer Toilet: Ek Prem Katha released, she went overboard along with her husband’s record breaking film. She tweeted a picture of a man defecating on Juhu beach during her morning routine. When she slammed over her ignorance over her privilege, she casually asked why people didn’t pay to go to the loo.

Then came Dua. As the icon of feminism, Twinkle became the sanskaari biwi and supported her husband’s sexist comments. She cemented her role as only one thing that I can think of now: a seasonal feminist. She proved me wrong when I thought she was all weather, but clearly she has summers and days of hibernation.

Many of you would argue why it’s a condition of ‘to each his own.’ Of course it is. I completely understand if Twinkle does not want to join the group that Mallika Dua belongs to. But then, why fake it? That’s beyond me. It’s one thing to put another woman for hitting out your husband, but things tend to fly out of the window if you trivialise your husband’s inclination to ‘bell gadis’ and his need for ‘duas’. That’s low, quite low.

Her aura on social media rests on her schedule and her fancies. It’s all about convenience. Is it legit for us to be wary about every word she utters or every word that she writes? Yes, it’s completely legit. She might not mean the joke you just laughed at. She might not even mean the pearls of women empowerment wisdom she’s trying to string together in a piece.

This actually reminds me of a little something she had written in a leading national daily about sexual harassment of women at work. “We pick off the pieces of baloney from the surface and throw it into the garbage, focusing only on the parts we can digest, our stomachs constantly churning.” Another one —“Do not stalk her, touch her, send her lewd messages and emails. And as far as compliments go, try telling her about her great presentation skills, her way with numbers, her astute negotiations.”

When her husband happened to act (even if remotely) like the frog (she calls men frogs in her piece on harassment) she writes about, her argument on women goes redundant, and that's where you convert from Twinkle loving to Twinkle doubt-ing. And dear reader, that’s how Mrs. Funnybones lost her wit with me, at least.